Can you give us some context, please. Like a person who is most of the time sweet and kind, then one day he behaves differently and people ask him why. Then he says so. How are "mine" and "me" used in other cases? Thank you. Unpredictable mind said:. In that case, it is 'another side of me '. Together you start examining the sides of your object. After having examined a few sides, you move to your friend's many-sided object and start examining it.
After awhile you say,"Let's have a look at another side of mine. If you then have specific questions, come back and ask on the forum. Edinburgher Senior Member Scotland. I don't find loghrat's logic very convincing.
In the given context, I would prefer "another side of mine" on the grounds that it parallels "a friend of mine". We aren't talking about me, but about something of mine, namely my personality. It is no exaggeration to say that my other self has given me the opportunity to become the best possible version of myself. Allowing that private, deeply-repressed, and sometimes-ugly side of ourselves to control us by ignoring its existence. Our other selves, just like all shadows, lose their power when you shine the light on them. How has its presence affected your life?
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Time to get personal, people! I get to be the first one to comment this week :0 … anyways, this blog post was different reading it, than I expected! However, I used to bend, twist and turn to meet others wishes, not my own. Recently, since I did become healthy for ME and started taking care to eat correctly, combating my food addiction, for ME..
You know already, Shola, it has been life changing, in the most wonderful aspects of learning from you! Anyways, I was bullied horribly growing up from peers in school. I am a very tall gal and I was made fun of for towering over the other kids. They figured out this got to me and the whole group of other students teased me right through high school graduation! Over this past year, I learned not to do this, as much. I mean, be nice, kind, considerate..
I decided to not let such bullying or losing friends, due to my lifestyle change, to stop me this time. This hurts me so very much. That is where my judgmental side has reared its ugly head. I know this and it is a struggle I have been dealing with for this past year. Hey Kristen, thanks for sharing!
I agree that our shadow selves do need a stern talking to every now and then, and we definitely need to keep a close eye on it to ensure that it never gets a hold of steering wheel of our lives. As a former bullying victim, I could completely relate to your story. Again, thanks so much for sharing!
Thanks Shola! Happy Thanksgiving Holiday to you and everyone here! Yes, even though I understand that all my coworkers, in my department, are so jealous and so hurtful towards me; I still feel hurt by it, to this day, to be honest. They cannot outright bully me anymore, but they still get their digs in..
But, I pushed and pushed for our policy manual to be changed to stop them. I still feel resent towards them and negative thoughts, a lot of the time. I can forgive the fact that they are intimidated by my successes and jealous.. I think that also causes me to bully others in my head.. I was bullied so badly growing up, raped at 18 then entering into an abusive marriage. I am not making excuses by any means for abusers out there.. I understand this logic.. I accept it as well; however, I still feel anger towards bullies that I have dealt with in my life.
I think that is the womanly emotional side of me.. Logically, I can totally let go, emotionally, not so much! This is a very interesting topic, Shola. Is it the impulsive, kind of lazy side?source site
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Or is it the impatient, sometimes critical side that emerges when I am over-tired? Or is it just any part of me that I may not be proud of? I will have to put some thought in to this. I am quite aware of all of those things about myself. Thanks for chewing on this brain food, my friend! Her ex was an evil man who beat her, and her children, I had to help, so she came to live with me, my girls and my husband. This is when he started threatening us all. I went to court with my friend, over and over, it was horrible.
Around this time I got sick, very sick. I was told I was going to die. I admit I became very isolated from everyone, including my friend. Anyway fast forward to last year, when I found out my friend was pregnant by her ex husbands best friend, I made sure I txt her everyday to make sure she was okay. Then a few months ago everything blew up in my face.
The worst part is her ex told me she would drop me like a hot potato when she had no use for me. As ever thank you Shola, for being the voice of reason I needed. Hi Tessa! I just wanted to give you some reflective thought on what you went through, from a woman that endured.. I was.. I become clingy and desperate when I date and discovered, for now, do better being single. It is, first of all, from knowing no other way, living with an abuser. It kind of puts a sick balance into the relationship.
The Other Side of Me
Also it becomes that persons, fight or flight mode for survival. She used you, point blank. I know that hurts, as it has been done to me over and over again.. It is not your fault at all. Now, becoming pregnant by the best friend? Not sure how to help with that one, but major co dependence comes to mind here. Some women believe that if they get pregnant, this equals a man to stay with them.. I got pregnant, he beat me until I miscarried as he told me he put it there, and could take it away.. I left him a few short months later; got safe, never looked back.
But, did have many many issues over the past 15 years, I have come to terms with, dealing with and getting strong.
The Other Side of Me
That led me to this website too! I recently gave up my food addiction last August.. That did not go over too well with my coworkers and several friends.. I have suffered terrible bullying as a result..
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Stay positive! Damn Tessa, that is some serious drama!
As for your friend, I am so thankful that you now fully know what she is all about. Just feel blessed that she is no longer a part of your life and focus on the people who are your real friends and loved ones. Most importantly, proudly dust yourself off and put her and your relationship with her in the rear view mirror—you deserve so much more than the crumbs she was offering you. Thanks for sharing! Right no, PhillyL! Having him around messing with your happiness would be no bueno, indeed. Shola, you seem to have a magical way of presenting topics just when I need them!